Wednesday, April 23, 2008

The Plan

In the beginning was The Plan.
And then came The Assumptions.
And The Assumptions were without form.
And The Plan was without substance.
And a terrible darkness fell upon the face of the Workers.
And they spoke among themselves, saying "It is a crock of shit, and it stinks."
And the Workers went unto their Supervisors and said loudly "It is a bucket of dung, and we cannot live with the smell."
Whereupon the Supervisors went unto their Managers and didst say "It is a container of excrement, and it is very strong, such that none may abide by it."
The Managers went quickly up into the temple and seeing there the Directors of the company, went unto them, saying in pious voices "It is a vessel of fertiliser, and none may abide its strength."
After much feasting and lewd revellry, the Directors spoke among themselves, saying to one and other "It contains that which aids plant growth, and it is very strong."
And together the Directors went up onto the mount and finding there the Vice President, said gravely "It promotes growth, and it is very powerful."
Seizing upon this information the Vice President, went unto the President, saying, "This new Plan will actively promote the growth and vigour of the company with very powerful effects."
The President looked upon The Plan and saw that it was good.
And The Plan became Policy.
And this is how Shit Happens.

Right now, the company I work for has adopted the Plan with knobs on.


  1. There's a lot of (sh)it going around.

  2. Yep, in fact, looks like a load of elephants after a vindaloo party...

  3. Mmmmm... elephant...

    I mean mmmm vindaloo.

    MMMMMMM... elephant vindaloo...

  4. Anonymous12:40 pm

    great mounds of shit eventually spontaneously combust.

    Sounds dire, Weenie. Time to get out maybe?

  5. For first time in a long time, thinking about it RB...

  6. Might not be a bad idea. Mind, if it was worth sticking through it last time...

    I've left two companies because it seemed more painfully obvious to the "plebs" (people that actually *did* the flipping work) than the morons upstairs that wall-shaped things were approaching very quickly.

  7. I work mostly in the public sector - this is all too close to home(!)