Sunday, January 17, 2010


I've had a long weekend and was proposing to get on top of all manner of things. I've failed miserably.

Anyway, was going to catch up with my blogging, what I've been up to etc but need to write about something else that I found out about.

My godson EB ran away last week. He's sixteen and in the middle of doing the first lot of his GCSE exams. For two days, nobody knew where he was and his family were frantic. How did they find out where he was? They contacted his girlfriend via Facebook...

He was staying at a friend's (not one of his usual close friends) but get this...his friend's mother knew he'd run away but didn't think to contact EB's mum! How utterly irresponsible, when all she had to do was to just call and say that he was ok! Needless to say, there was some sort of showdown at the house, resulting in EB saying he didn't want to go back home.

He's now at his dad's but has since refused to speak to his mum or any of his siblings, ignoring their calls and texts. I spoke to his mum MR for a long time on the phone - she doesn't think he's going to go back home. She said that he was always breaking rules and had no respect for her. That they never knew what he felt or that he was upset until it was too late. What I couldn't say to her and I've always thought was that she had a HELL of a lot of rules in her house and I'm not surprised he was always breaking them. Yes, the rules were in place to ensure the younger ones were in line but when you've got the same rules for 8 and 6 year olds, then they're kinda stifling for teenagers...And hello, boys/men not telling people how they feel?

Anyway, I told her that I would text him to see if he would respond. He did, telling me that he'd moved out, that his exams were fine, work was good and that things were great with his girlfriend. He said he was really happy where he was (at his dad's). No mention of his mum or siblings, so I didn't mention them either.

It's not for me to tell him what to do - if he thinks I'm siding with her, he'll stop responding. At least I can tell his mum that he's ok.


  1. Wow, serious stuff. My sister ran away from home when she was 17 and she turned out okay. Eventually.

    Big game on Wednesday weenie, big game! :)

  2. Yikes, that must have been worrying at the least. Glad its turned out well, or well enough considering.

    Have to agree with you that rules need to change as people grow up, but also that you are totally right to not get in the middle. Worst place to be.
    Hope things go well from now on.

  3. Gosh, that was very irresponsible of the friend's mother not to let anyone know. How awful.

    It is hard to be a parent of children with widely differing ages - before my daughter left home for Uni, I had an 18 year old girl and 9,7 and 5 year old boys. It wasn't the rules side I found hard, more that the younger ones kind of constrain some of the things you might do with the older ones.
    I tend to go for age-specific rules - that way they know that they will ease off or change as they get older (bedtimes, pocket money, things they are allowed to do alone etc) - it's all clear then and whilst they still say "it's not fair" I think that they can see that it is!

    But oh dear! It'll probably sort itself out and you are doing the right thing - being there as someone to chat to but not acting as a go-between for "statements" or getting involved.

  4. RS - yeah, was a make or break game for us last night - good job the ref was crap, for our sake! Onwards and upwards I hope!

    Fence - yep, I'm better off not in the middle, but at some point, I may just make a suggestion and just leave it at that.

    RB - totally, I was so angry when I heard about that irresponsible woman, how would she feel if that had been her son? Re the rules, yes, I think she found that the younger ones constrained them but it was easier and less noisy probably to enforce them for eveyone - probably not the best thing. I do recall one time after she was having a whingefest about EB that I said "He's a teenager, he probably just needs a bit of space" - she nearly bit my head off and said she knew I'd be on his side! I've never really said much about things after that! Anyway, he's been in touch again since so that's good news that I can pass on.